Sunday, December 21, 2008

More Uselessness

I wish we could just sit those boys and girls with the guns down and drill some poetry, music and art into their heads. I guess when your stomach is empty and your mind is controlled this overtly refined lifestyle doesn’t come naturally; it’s easier to pick up weapons and fire at people, creating more haters, just like them. It is our privilege to reflect and create, with our bellies full in our four walled fortresses. Keep wishing, keep talking.

Saturday, December 20, 2008

Just saw this:

"It is no coincidence that in no known language does the phrase 'As pretty as an Airport' appear."

Douglas Adams



If yesterday was the worst, today is the best.

PS - Thank you Danny, Wise One, Supreme Bebe, Elf, Froggy, Sammy and Murachan.

In spite of everything, I will remember you Mishti. There are no words to express how I feel. I will miss you everyday little one. I will never forgive myself for what happened to you. I'm so sorry. You are in my heart forever.

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

I thought long and hard about whether I should write this post or not, and then I decided that I will. I don't care if people who know me think this is personal. It isn't. And I won't justify myself.

Plagiarism is illegal. More than that, it's sick and wrong. Especially when done by someone who pretends to be holier-than-thou about it. Which is why I was shocked when I saw that this talented person's art had been blatantly copied here, without the original writer having been given any credit whatsoever.

I have been plagiarized by someone I used to know in the past, and I remember the outrage and heartbreak I felt. It caused me to make my older blog private, and the posts in my new blog to be of a much lower quality.

The writer who has been copied is in the process of getting her works published. Some of these works have been stolen and the writer is considering deleting her Deviant Art account. This is what plagiarism does - it prevents original artists from sharing their work with the world.

I am not going to launch into a tirade here, because I will not sink to that level. I'll just say that this is one step too far, and a line has been crossed, and that I sincerely hope that people learn from the consequences.

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Olive You


Like a lingering tune this sweetness plays a sad
Little tune in my mind. This quick web of fear
Must grip me especially when you are so far,
Why this must be so, I cannot say. I only know
That it happens. Some reasons and questions
Are beyond the wisdom of this life or many
Such lives. Little joys are not denied though.
Like when you hear something you love and
Store it away, more precious than those
Quotes I spout, of course it is, for
You cannot possibly know how I feel them
As I say them to you. Not glib but sincere.
But of course you are right my words my
Very own words just for you must mean
Something special, something beyond
The capacity of this life and many such lives.

Saturday, November 29, 2008

Seeing Red

Like a friend mentioned, now is when you feel them seeping slowly from the TV screen into your own lives. Changing things you don't want changed, altering them beyond recognition, marring them outside of your control, while you sit and react differently, each and every one of you, whether you speak or turn away, whether you cry or stand stoically, whether you shrug or mourn, every single one of you is affected.

Here are mere boys who want to give up their lives so mindlessly. Who have stormed into our lives and destroyed something vital.

And will anything bring our dead back?

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Thanks Giving

Sometimes things need to go horribly wrong for you to realize exactly how much is right - read something to that effect on a book cover the other day.

Anyway, that's not what this post is about. I am writing this to show you the appreciation I never verbalize. I need to do it now, and you need to hear it.

You - have always been my best friend and worst critic, however cliched that might sound. I value your unconditional love, I am scared of losing you, I feel guilty for not listening to you.

Throughout it all I love the fact that you are the serene and wonderful soul that you are. Thanks for giving me perspective, and immense love and support. I love you, Mom.

And there are the friends.

You, who put yourself in between - which is incredible because you don't do that. I see the enormity of it now, especially after you also understood when I messed up. I love you so much, and I want you to know that I'm always here for you. Always.

You, who don't even know me that well. And your friends. You guys are really special people. I am looking forward to knowing you all, especially you who are so strong willed and compassionate. Our times together have meant a lot, and I hope there's more where that came from.

You, who has gone through worse and taken it much better. You're so strong, and I am proud of you.

You, the grounded one, who supports everything I do, right or wrong.

To the ones who have cared. Thank you.

Friday, November 7, 2008

And now I know what you meant

"Coming Back To Life"

Where were you when I was burned and broken
While the days slipped by from my window watching
Where were you when I was hurt and helpless
Because the things you say and the things you do surround me
While you were hanging yourself on someone else's words
Dying to believe in what you heard
I was staring straight into the shining sun

Lost in thought and lost in time
While the seeds of life and the seeds of change were planted
Outside the rain fell dark and slow
While I pondered on this dangerous but irresistible pastime
I took a heavenly ride through our silence
I knew the moment had arrived
For killing the past and coming back to life

I took a heavenly ride through our silence
I knew the waiting had begun
And headed straight..into the shining sun

Pink Floyd

Wednesday, November 5, 2008


Eight steps till I reach the summit, my line breaks and I fall down the rocky terrain
My bones are broken into pieces, my mind can't wait to get up and do it again
I can feel I'm getting stronger, the longer I'm pushed to the limit...

(Someday is now - the Scorpions)

"You never bend, you never break, you seem to know
just what it takes. You're a fighter
It's in the blood, it's in the will, it's in the mighty
hands of steel. When you're standin your ground.
And you never *give in* when you're back's to the wall
gonna fight till the end and your taking it all."

(The Touch - Stan Bush)

"Easy to bitch/ Easy to whine/ Easy to moan/ Easy to cry/ Easy to feel like there ain't nothing in your life

"Harder to work/ Harder to strive/ Harder to be glad to be alive/ But its really worth it if you give it a try"

(Easy - Cowboy Mouth)

Sunday, October 5, 2008


...well, sort of. I got Mia home last year on 4th October, when he was a few months old, and according to the vet (who shall henceforth be known as bloodyraskillvet) a girl. Some kitty pictures of Mia to celebrate this beautiful and momentous occasion:

I remember him now, on his first day at his new home. Him jumping onto the bed repeatedly, waking up to find him sniffing my face, his furry little body curled up on my lap in absolutely blissful slumber.

I have a thousand memories. And a lifetime of gratitude and love for this little thing who I got home one day because I realized I had grown too attached to him to leave him behind. He was mine, out of all the rest, and so I had to bring him home.

You light up my life, baby. I love you unconditionally.

Friday, October 3, 2008


I am currently reading this

And dying to catch all the movies ever made based on it.

We’ve done Frankenstein for classes at the university, which I thoroughly enjoyed.

I was hooked the minute I started reading.

Thank you very much Mandy, for your generosity. I now have three books that I need to read through and through for the end sem exams.

Here is some stuff I found very interesting in the preface of the edition that Mandy was kind enough to lend me:

The destructive consequences of single-minded obsessions are the heart of the story whether it is read as a Gothic tale or religious allegory, science-fiction or moral science parable.

In each case the question posed by the story is, “Where does evil come from?” or, “What is the origin of monstrous behaviour?” These are questions to which we have had to return over and over in the nearly two hundred years since Mary Shelley gave birth to her story and this is why it has such enduring relevance and fascination.

John Mepham
Kingston University

(extract from the Publisher’s Introduction)

And from the author herself:

I busied myself to think of a story – a story to rival those which had excited us to this task. One which would speak to the mysterious fears of our nature….I thought and pondered – vainly. I felt that blank incapability of invention which is the greatest misery of authorship, when dull Nothing replies to our anxious invocations. Have you thought of a story? I was asked each morning. And each morning I was forced to reply with a mortifying negative.”

Mary Wollstonecraft Shelley
London, 15 October 1831

(extract from the Author’s Introduction, on how the whole process of creating Frankenstein began, and why, and how she was able to finally write it)

I can relate to the “dull Nothing” being the biggest obstacle to creative writing. I’ve had it plague me for the longest time. I’ve thrown it out of the window ever since I realized I could.

Tuesday, September 30, 2008


"No one ever told me that grief felt so like fear."
-- C.S. Lewis

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Blog Award!

Thanks Tia, and this goes out to the blogs I love reading

Mandy - Your poetry, especially, is a joy to read. I do keep coming back, even though I don't leave comments.

Ghostrider - If there's someone who is passionate about bikes, it's you. I like it. Please keep at it.

Tia - I like your sense of humour, the way you write, the works.

- Fill up the new one, bebe!

The Guiding Light - Spread the love <3

Nikhil - And then there's this one. Catch the novel extracts. He be intellectual, much.

Monday, September 15, 2008


I haven’t blogged in a really long time. Whatever I write lately, or for that matter, anyone writes, seems pointless, even superficial. It’s like everyone wants to project a certain image and that makes them this smart alecky, know- it- all person and I seriously don’t want to read anything that reeks of that.

I’ve also read some really honest and inspiring writing, though, and I hope I break through this wall and find that place for myself.

College is showing me pathways I opened myself up for in the last year. It is giving me the overview that I lacked, and the opportunity to interact with the kind of people I’ve never met before.

But I am a lot more guarded and closed as far as my personal feelings are concerned. I am treading softly, slowly to see if there is anything genuine left in this world. And because I allow myself to see so much more, many things seem like a pleasant surprise. Lower expectations can be good or bad depending on how you see it.

I like being in a college that doesn’t restrict me in any way. New doors open all the time. You’re also expected to take responsibility for yourself in terms of both work and play. Nobody will spoon feed you, nobody will sugar coat it for you if you fuck up, people will let you be who you are. It suits me. I’m enjoying it.

I’m also doing things I missed out on in the last five years. And though these things seem basic to people who’ve been participating in this or that all of their school lives, for me this time and these things are a chance to grab what I missed, before it’s too late.

I’m going to keep at it and do more things. Everything that I ever wanted to do, I will do in these three years. It’s a challenge to myself, and I intend on meeting it head on.

Monday, May 26, 2008

Itteh Bitteh Kitteh Committeh

oh hai... we iz born...there is three of us k?...moar pics coming soon to you from dis hooman...kthnxbai (lolcat speak courtesy, pics courtesy this hooman called Shleya Shanghani)

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

A Thought

I wonder why, even after being equipped with so many means of communication, and often so many people to talk to, we never express what we really crave, really wish for, what we really want to change.

I guess it would mean admitting that our lives are less than perfect, and that's something nobody wants to do.

Friday, May 9, 2008


Wonder what it's all about then;
Wonder when you'll have it figured out
One day all your notions, built up, over time
One day all your notions will shatter
When are you truly free?

The instance when you break the cycle
And one illusion after another breaks
The instance when you don't feel like
You're cheating yourself
The instance when you know that the
thought you just had
Wasn't suggested to you by subtle manipulation
Or wrested out of you by blatant coercion
But spoken with clarity, peace, and belief

Tuesday, April 29, 2008

Thank You

For calling at midnight
And waking me up at 3 am again
For making the music that
You love so much; it really shows
For being the source of
Wrapping paper-ribbon entanglements

Will you grow with me as I learn more?

Or will we grow apart and find ourselves...
I don't know, but you will always remain alive
Alive within the mixed memories of eighteen years

For now, penetrate my catatonia
And let me find out some more
About the music, and about you and me
Everything in between

Thank You, for this year

Thank you so much

Saturday, April 5, 2008

Mad Girl's Love Song

by Sylvia Plath

"I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead;
I lift my lids and all is born again.
(I think I made you up inside my head.)

The stars go waltzing out in blue and red,
And arbitrary blackness gallops in:
I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead.

I dreamed that you bewitched me into bed
And sung me moon-struck, kissed me quite insane.
(I think I made you up inside my head.)

God topples from the sky, hell's fires fade:
Exit seraphim and Satan's men:
I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead.

I fancied you'd return the way you said,
But I grow old and I forget your name.
(I think I made you up inside my head.)

I should have loved a thunderbird instead;
At least when spring comes they roar back again.
I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead.
(I think I made you up inside my head.)"

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Tagged by Sam

A is for Aam (Summer's almost here!)
B is for Books
C is for Chinese food, Caturday and Crispy Fried Chicken
D is for Dark Chocolate, Dad and Dirt Biking
E is for Entertainment and Scrooge's first name
F is for Finito
G is for Gypsy
H is for Happy People
I is for Innah
J is for Jeans, Juto and Jontu
K is for Kazzy (which also makes me want to mention Sho) and Kittens
L is for Love, Life, Laziness, LOLcats and Leg Warmers
M is for Mumbai, Mom, Mia, the Moon, Marine Drive and Music
N is for Nouveau
O is for the shape your mouth makes at the same time that your eyes pop out (:O)
P is for Patience, which by the way, always pays
Q is for Questions
R is for Reading, Resting, Riding and Reaping
S is for Shreyaaaa!
T is for Toxic - all the spitefulness that I keep sensing *shudder*
U is for Ugh, Ultra and the Universe
V is for Vending Machine
W is for Witch, cause Witches are the best
X is for Xergosomkia, which I just made up
Y is for Yup, Yep, Yus and all the other forms of Yes we keep experimenting with
Z is for Zzzzzz, which I am perpetually deprived of

I tag Lucid Darkness, Kazarelth, Ghost Rider and Kaye

Monday, January 14, 2008